Expression of a Heart that's In Love
My Heart
I first fell in love with Jesus when I was a sophomore in high school.
At the time, I was depressed, suicidal, and had absolutely no self-esteem.
Then something unexpected happened—some new friends invited me to a Christian comedian concert. The comedian was hilarious. For the first time in a long time, I laughed so hard that warm tears streamed down my face.
At the end of the show, the comedian asked everyone to bow their heads. He invited the Holy Spirit to begin moving and speaking to people’s hearts. Then he said, “If anyone wants to accept Jesus, get out of your seat and come forward.”
All of a sudden, I felt myself rising and making my way to the center aisle. My head was down—heavy with shame and low self-worth. But as I walked forward, I felt the weight begin to lift. My head began to rise. The feeling of worthlessness started to roll off my back.
I made it to the front, but I don’t remember much of what happened next. I’m sure they led me in a prayer to accept Jesus into my heart.
What I do remember is getting home that night, heading straight to my room, and—for the first time—talking to Jesus on my own.
That night, I declared my love for Him.
I said, “Jesus, I will live for You no matter what. Whether it’s right or wrong in the eyes of others. Whether it’s cool or uncool—I will live for You.”
Later in my second year of high school, I penned my first poem called My Love.
A year after that, I bought a ring with the inscription: “I am my beloved’s, and my beloved is mine.”
It was my engagement ring to Jesus.
To this day, I still wear a similar ring.
It’s hard to believe it’s been 37 years since I gave my heart to Jesus.
I wish I could say that life has been easy since I said “I do” to Him. But the truth is, my journey has had its ups and downs—just like any relationship.
There have been seasons when my heart overflowed with love for Him... and others when I felt nothing at all.
There were times when I stayed close to His side, and other times when I wandered off to do my own thing.
Here’s the amazing part:
Every time I wandered, Jesus was there waiting for me.
Sometimes, He didn’t even wait—He pursued me.
And every time I returned, He took me back without hesitation.
If I’m honest, I wish I could tell you that because of Jesus, I no longer struggle with mental illness. But even now, I still wrestle with depression and bipolar disorder.
This illness has taken a toll.
Many times, I’ve cried out to Jesus, pleading with Him to take it away.
His answer has always been the same:
A promise that He will walk with me through it—and that He will use it for His glory.
And I can testify—He has kept both promises.
While I remain here on earth, my heart longs for the day I hear His voice calling me home—to be with Him forever. In a perfect world, where I will never again stray.
Forever by His side.
Forever His.
For Your Heart
Do you know how much Jesus loves you?
His love is not like the love we often experience in this world.
It doesn’t fade with time. It’s not based on how well you perform, how often you pray, or whether you feel you “deserve” it.
Jesus’s love is everlasting.
It has no beginning and no end.
Before you took your first breath, He already loved you.
And even in your deepest failure, He still does.
Think about that:
There has never been a moment when Jesus didn’t love you.
And there never will be.
In a world filled with conditions and expectations, His love remains unconditional and faithful.
It pursues you when you wander.
It holds you when you’re broken.
It restores you when you’re lost.
When the enemy whispers, “You’re not good enough,”
Jesus responds, “You are Mine.”
When your heart is heavy with guilt or shame,
His love lifts you up and says, “You are forgiven.”
When you feel abandoned or alone,
He gently reminds you, “I will never leave you or forsake you.”
Jesus’s love doesn’t just tolerate you—it delights in you.
It’s my prayer and deepest desire that you would come to know the passionate, faithful love Jesus has for you.
And that one day, you’ll give your heart to Him...
and call Him your Love.
Below is the first poem I ever wrote. I hope it speaks to your heart as it did to mine all those years ago.
My Love
Sitting here reminiscing, when I first fell in love
Remembering Your gentle touch, feeling like a dove
hearing Your voice, calling me to be Your love.
I remember back to when I first held Your hand,
Promising to cherish You, in this foreign land.
I know I will always be the apple of Your eye.
as a result of Your steadfast love that will never die.
When dark nights come, when I’m feeling lost and scared,
when all of my courage has quickly disappeared,
It’s then I hear Your soothing voice
gently reminding me
That I have nothing to fear
Because I belong to You and You are always here.
There was a time, when You proved Your love for me
and showed me, once and for all,
You will never, ever leave me.
With powerful action for my sins, You died upon a tree.
It was on the cross
where You displayed Your love for all to see.
When I heard the news You had died, I admit I cried,
but tears of sadness quickly turned into tears of joy
When You arose and I found You standing by my side.
You said You had to go, to prepare a place for me,
a home filled with perfect love, joy and tranquility
Where we will reside together, for eternity.
My love, there are still times when I feel very discouraged
When I grow suddenly afraid and need to be encouraged.
Even so, I am still quick to rejoice
because before leaving to depart
You left a promise that I took to heart.
You will return and there with Your voice
In the clouds You will be
calling me to join You, indefinitely.
